Stressing Tests, Testing Stress

As OGT’s are quickly approaching it seems that teenagers are burrowing down in their rooms, collecting food and storing it like it’s the end of the world.

I’ve recently been informed by a friend of mine that nobody actually does this. It’s just what smart kids do to study and get away with “overeating”.  Surely I’m not the only one doing this.

The first word that pops into my mind when somebody says “test” is STESS.

I need to study. Should I pull an all-nighter? What does this even mean? 

I mean, LOADS of stress is put on all teenagers. We not only have to worry about future plans for school and our life, but we have to incorporate graduation tests and PARCC testing as well? I’m sorry, but that’s just a crap ton of work.

I understand. I get that they’re preparing us for the real world. But aren’t we living in the real world as it is? I know teenagers that have to raise their household because their parents don’t do anything. That is the real world and I don’t think that is what you want to prepare us for. I’m sick of everyone claiming that tests are to prepare us, when in reality they were made to track our progress and try to get us all to learn the same things. I don’t want to be monotonous. I don’t care if we don’t outdo other countries in the academic aspect but so long as we keep our heads and quit screwing everyone out of their jobs and money. Sorry off topic.

OGT’s. How’s that?

This will be the very last year my school takes part in the OGT’s which means I am the ending class of that test. The freshman have to take PARCC testing which is almost as worse.

I hear that there are various stages that you could potentially be placed into during the OGT test. Basic, Average, Advanced, and something higher that I probably won’t get.

I’m going to paste the link to practice tests for our friends who have them coming up as well:

http://education.ohio.gov/Topics/Testing/Testing-Materials/Ohio-Graduation-Tests-OGT-Full-Length-Practice-T

http://www.flashcardsecrets.com/ogt/

Wish us luck!

Why I can’t Ride my Bike

An actual conversation that I just had

Me: I can’t wait to ride my bike this summer! I’m going to drive up to the bike trail all the time this summer.

Mom: “Well, I don’t think so, a lady was just raped there by four men.”

*speechless*

I’m utterly speechless. We go around planning things, fun things. Never a thought or care in the world. All we want to do is enjoy the time we have.

So why can’t I ride my bike?

There is so much more going on in the world than we will ever comprehend. Bad things happen DAILY. Our eyes and ears block out the bad things and pretend that life is infinite. We are always going to be here, right? Living and loving spending our days where we want to be. I want to be at the bike trail.

I worry. I worry for the future and for the present. I worry that people won’t heed warnings in dangerous settings.

Why do I still have to worry that whenever I walk outside of my house I could be mugged? Why do I have to worry that if I walk alone, thinking; I could be raped? I SHOULDN’T HAVE TO WORRY FOR MY SAFETY EVERY MINUTE OF EVERY DAY. This feeling is killing me. Knowing that these things are happening to others is not okay. It isn’t okay to disregard the concern others have for me. They shouldn’t have to worry about me!

In this world I cannot be independent. I can’t walk alone outside anymore. A great anxiety overcomes me as I walk outside knowing I might not return. Nobody should have to fear for their safety. No one should have to fear that they will be raped, mugged, shot, etc.. in a public place.

“An American is sexually assaulted every two minutes, and 9 out of 10 survivors are women.

I don’t know about you, but I’m profiling everyone after dark. If I’m walking alone at night and you are a man between the ages of 20 and 60 and your gait looks even remotely confident, I’m terrified of you. I’ve thought a lot about whether the fear is racist or classist, and it really isn’t. It really doesn’t discriminate much, except that the person normally falls into the above age range. No matter how tired, drunk, confident, sad, or excited I am, I get a piercing feeling in my stomach when someone of that description is walking toward me on the street. The moment they walk past me, I momentarily lose the ability to breathe as I role-play different scenarios in my head. I normally have a hand in my pocket clutching my keys or phone. The moment they walk past me I close my eyes and keep walking, ball my fists, and prepare. When they’re a distance that I’ve arbitrarily deemed safe behind me, I exhale and say a tiny little thank you to the street gods for sparing me. Then I chastise myself for a second and carry on walking.

My almost pathological fear of men in the streets after dark is something I need to continue to work on, and I recognize and own that. I also know that most people are good, kind, and just people, and that even if they aren’t, it is unlikely that they are rapists trolling the streets for unsuspecting women to assault. But in the same way that I own that, I think that if someone falls into the most-likely-to-rape people category, and he wants to show the world that he is not to be feared, or to create a world where women don’t fear for our safety in the street, then some of the onus is on him to address that inequality in his day-to-day life.

It isn’t fair to all men that random women in the street fear them just because of their gender. But, and this shouldn’t be a newsflash, they do, and that fact should make men really mad. The fact that we fear men in the street (to varying degrees), is because a portion of men do some stuff that is, if not illegal, at least a little unseemly. It’s scary to be catcalled by a group of drunken frat boys when you’re walking home alone. It’s scary to have someone slowly look you up and down when you’re walking home, chatting on the phone to your friend about godknowswhat. And when it isn’t scary, it’s an inconvenience.” (http://www.rolereboot.org/life/details/2014-08-im-sick-afraid-walk-alone-night/ )

-Ave

Branching Out (Links in post!)

Hello all!

It seems that nowadays people are interested in things that catch their attention right away. I’m starting to believe that this blog isn’t getting the publicity we originally wanted it to in the beginning. Blogs reach people yes, but not efficiently. We struggle with the motivation to write when we fear that nobody is really even reading these posts. Blogs are becoming like personal websites that link viewers to OTHER websites (youtube channels, personal facebooks + twitters, etc…).

So with that in mind… we have decided to join other social networks, websites to ultimately expand our viewers and obtain larger goals in the long run.

Here are our other websites:

GMAIL- yindecisive@gmail.com

GOOGLE+-https://plus.google.com/104835959347678605180/posts

FACEBOOKhttps://www.facebook.com/beyondthefangirl/timeline

YOUTUBE- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC2J5_UwS3is0GddmHhxvXgA

Sad Movies + Recommendations

Two sad movies in a row isn’t good for anybody’s attitude. Yet somehow I find myself addicted to the sadness and despair of the characters as they push their way through life and the hard times they’re facing. There’s something like sincerity in the characters faces. Revealing their thoughts and feelings, pouring into the viewers making them  me feel exactly what they are.

The characters fill the film with a disparity of life and love.

Life- the experience of being alive.

Love- unselfish loyal and benevolent concern for the good of another.

Even in the difficulty of surviving for them, they manage to put love before life and that is breathtakingly beautiful. Because even people who are hurting can think of others before themselves. Even if they’re feeling pain they can prevent it from happening to someone they love.

If you would like to watch a sad movie I recommend:

Tiger Eyes- After Davey’s father is killed in a hold-up, she and her mother and younger brother visit relatives in New Mexico. Here Davey is befriended by a young man who helps her find the strength to carry on and conquer her fears.

Gimme Shelter- A pregnant teenager flees her abusive mother in search of her father, only to be rejected by her dad and forced to survive on the streets until a compassionate stranger offers a hopeful alternative.

They might not sound like movies you normally watch, but they are truly amazing.

Welcome to a new year, 2015

Ave here! Happy New Year!

11:58 PM – Everyone in my family is rushing to the living room, watching the television impatiently as Ryan Seacrest finishes stating the highlights of the year.

11:59 PM – The cameras zoom in to Times Square as everyone is counting down to the ball dropping. People are anxiously staring towards the ball counting their New Year resolutions, hoping for a better year.

——————————————————————————————————————–

12:00 AM – Times Square is the loudest place in America. People throw confetti in the air, kiss the love of their life, embrace family, throw their hands up in the air and say goodbye to the past.

This marks a new year. New things are coming out in 2015, things we could only imagine. New people will enter our lives, and some may even leave them. You might meet the person of your dreams. Hope is filling the air as people celebrate. 2015 might be the time for all of this. Nobody knows. This might be your year.

You are holding so much weight on your shoulders as you say goodbye to 2014. Maybe it’s time to let go of that weight, whatever it may be. This is time for a fresh start. Don’t miss the chance. Love your family more than ever, surprise your significant other, let go of old grudges, make new friends. Let it go. Don’t make this another year of regrets. Make this a year to remember and adore. Remember every year you get older, you grow, you learn from your past mistakes. Tale all of those things you’ve learned and use them this year. Try new things, go travel the world. Go do something with yourself that will benefit others.

This is your year, but don’t forget about others. Focus on improving yourself, spread kindness not gossip. Help someone who needs it. Don’t be bothered by people so easily.

Please, take this year as time to improve and explore. You need this break.

Let go of the past and move forward.

Let’s define: I love you

Ave here, up late and ranting!

Starting a new relationship and everything is going perfectly, right?

Well, that’s probably true. You’re getting to know each other, learning their facial expressions, and their smile. But, at some point aren’t you going to get tired of that person? The way they laugh when you tell them how your day went, the way they judge you from afar for not doing what they want… eventually the once “mutual” relationship is doomed and you’re left with chocolate and a box of tissues. Don’t you see how fast they end?

This is the average speed of a high school relationship. Blame hormones, right? That could be only but a fragment of what is wrong with relationships these days. I’m not trying to be a Debbie Downer,nor have I stopped believing completely in relationships. Some may work, but most…

See, teenagers have been through a lot of stress with schoolwork,but this is no way could have the mind-altering affect of stupidity for them. Isn’t school meant to educate people? Even when you’re learning about the process of cell division, the fundamentals of geometric shapes,and the Great Depression this doesn’t mean that you social skills should fail.

You see a girl/guy, you like them, why in the right mind does that mean immediately approach them? WAIT. You’re young. You’re what, just out of middle school? You’re still pretty much a noob. Often people don’t see eye to eye with me. Understandable.

Guy sees girl, guy talks to girl, girl flirts (easy much?), guy compliments girl, girl is flattered, guy is content with himself. Oh, must I go on? I’ve always felt as if the guy just wanted to see if he could get the girl that easily, and girls… let’s be honest…we don’t put up much of a barrier. Maybe we should start? If it is that easy to “further” a relationship there really are no true feelings. Just selfishness. After a while this couple posts their relationship status on Facebook (sounds familiar?). Gets 21 likes and comments. Both feel happy. They kiss, go on “dates” *cough movie, mcdonalds, cheap cough*, maybe ruin their purity for all eternity then out comes the worst three words that could be said, “I love you”.

They don’t mean it, they never mean it. It’s a game to them. Love is a toy being passed around and played with. But they are oblivious. In fact, the world is this way. The word love has slowly become berated and misused with time, making people crumble. Some may say love is inevitable. It isn’t. It’s so easy to avoid.

I guess what I’m trying to say is you are not in love teenagers/adults. You’ve only ever thought you were, like you expected it. How gullible and oblivious to the meaning you are. It is not meant to be thrown around, filling people with happiness and then letting them fall hard. It’s not a relationship status meant to provoke jealousy, nor the words used in a relationship to express an empty feeling.

Love is nothing, everything. Love is waiting.

Love is when your Grandmother tells you how she met you Grandfather during the war.

How she waited 2 years and so did he.

Seeing him exit the train and kneel to the ground in front of her, kissing her hand and crying, “you mean everything to me, please stay with me”.

Do you think you could do that?

No.

Do you think that your boyfriend in high school will bend down like that?

Do you think you could wait for him? If not then you can not know the meaning. You can not claim to have experienced love. Love is lost on this generation. Nobody seems to notice. It is not meant to be entertaining, rather straightforward and honest. That is love. That’s what love is. It’s nothing, it’s everything, it’s found only to be lost. It’s waiting.

Love is waiting, so let’s find it again.

Realism Not So Real?

It’s Cass here, logged on, and ready to roll.

Let’s talk about passion. We all have a passion for something, whether you know it or not. Maybe you haven’t found yours yet, and that’s fine. Maybe you’ve known it since you were 10, and that’s great. Or maybe, just maybe, you don’t even know how to find your passion. That’s were I come in.

Look, i’ve been where you are plenty of times. We are stuck in a world full of passionless people, going day by day trying to be “realistic.” Since we were young, we’ve all had some sort of dream. Whether you wanted to be a singer, a dancer, or even a bagger at the grocery store. That was your dream, and you believed it would come true.

As time went on, as it does, people told you to become realistic. Yet deep down, you still had that dream. Bubbling down in the core of who you truly are, you still had that tinge of hope. Hope that you could live to the expectation you set for yourself. And there we have it, there’s that passion. Yet, the passion isn’t there at all.

For, even though, you still love that dream. Day by day you force that dream back down inside of you, and live the all American “Realistic” dream. You go to a school, but you don’t really learn. You pass tests, but you barely get by. You go to work, just to try and survive. You say you still don’t know, what you want to be, but deep down inside, its eating you. It’s consuming you, the thought that you won’t be what you always dreamed of being.

Yet, why can’t you? Why can’t you be that singer or dancer? Why can’t you go to the job you actually enjoy, or go to a school that actually teaches you? We are being eaten by a society of realism, that’s not real at all. We are being taught that doctors and lawyers are the only important people in our society, and that our dreams, our passions, aren’t worthy of this world.

Our uniqueness, is shoved farther and farther away. Our world is becoming a paper thin sheet of sameness.

Our passions, will finally escape, when we learn to break free of the worlds clutches and be ourselves. Our passions, will consume ourselves, when we can finally shatter the idea of an All American “realistic” dream.

We will finally be who we are meant to be, when we can stop pressing the copy and paste button, on our lives. Accepting who we really are, and demanding to live the dreams that are built and bubbling inside of us.

Because, when we let those dreams free? Its only matter of time, before the world starts to see, all that we were meant to be. The world will be a much prettier place, with all our passions set free, into a world full of the right beliefs.

Do you agree? Let us know on Facebook, Twitter, or in the comments down below♥

Stacks to Piles to Mountains to Libraries.

Ave speaking! 

Perusing the mountains of books that have been added to my room over time, I’ve noticed a theme. A unique pattern among hundreds of books.

The main characters!

How have I not noticed this amazing yet somehow freakish coincidence? I must be oblivious to what words I am putting into my head as I read these but never truly compare it to other books.

Strong, so strong. The main characters are brave, strong, hopeful, and curious, all of the things we aspire to be. This had me thinking for quite a while. I have lived and dreamed of being in someone else’s shoes repeatedly. These lives mean so much to me. I have lived in Manhattan as a 18 year old boy, I have lived as an alien in hiding, I have lived as a Jewish girl during the holocaust, I have lived as a girl with cancer. I have experienced death, life, rejection, failure, happiness, love, and so much more.

These books have taught life lessons that I will carry with me for life. These strong courageous characters are molding me into something greater, something braver than what I once was. Without these stories of fiction and non-fiction I wouldn’t be who I am today. I would be weak, scared and have no hope for the future. The books make me think of the world in a greater point of view. Something of wonders and mystery that is held within its core, awaiting discovery.

Bright curious eyes search the world in order to find the mystery but we find books which (in secret) is the mystery. Books contain so much information, so many feelings of other people fluttering about waiting for a host to read and understand. These worlds that the books contain are built on imagery and perfection. The author’s desire is to make someone imagine scenarios in their head of how it is supposed to be. People helping people, not people running from their responsibility.

If everyone would take the time, sit down, and read a book. Maybe just maybe the world would be a better place. Maybe we would have great imaginations growing up and inventing new things, maybe we would have heroes among the ordinary people, maybe we would have greater life stories. Maybe we could live life with no regret. Because we did dream.

We are those strong characters. Together we can be the greatest story.